I Apologize

Originally written in Arabic in December 2007 and preserved from my personal diary.
This English version is an adaptation created with the help of AI.
The poem was written long ago for someone I loved and hurt.
Over the years its meaning has grown wider — it now speaks to all the people I have loved, wounded, or lost along the way.
It remains, above all, an apology and a reminder that love can survive even where relationships cannot.

To you I apologize
for my madness and my vanity,
for all my seas and wandering far,
for every reckless storm I was.

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My Ravaged Wound

Adapted from my 2016 bittersweet Arabic diary. Original Arabic version further below. Image by ROMAN ODINTSOV

Context

I wrote this text shortly after that night with Maya. She came into my bed, stripped down to her underwear, kissed me softly without crossing further, and fell asleep beside me. She let me hold her close, allowed me to touch her body, yet never allowed me to cross into full possession. She made me fall in love, then left in the morning — and never returned.

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